(Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.)
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Have you ever noticed that one bad decision rarely hurts us as much as the story we tell ourselves afterward? We skip the workout, miss the deadline, eat the thing we promised ourselves we wouldn't eat, put the project off one more day, and suddenly we're not just dealing with a missed action, we're dealing with guilt, frustration, disappointment, maybe even embarrassment, and the growing temptation to say, I'll start again Monday. If that's where you find yourself today, this episode is for you, my friend. Welcome to Goals in Grace with certified high performance coach, Reverend Dr. Juliet Spencer, where we protect what matters, finish what we start, and do it with a joyful heart.
Ready to lead with love, not depletion? Let's go. Let me tell you about a lesson I've had to learn more than once. I suspect many of you can relate.
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As I mentioned in a previous episode, several years ago, I wanted to write a book, and I was clear. I wanted to write the book, not someday, now. I had an idea, notes, format, research, good intentions.
What I didn't have was consistent action. Every day and every week, I had a reason. The church needed something, or someone was in crisis, or a deadline appeared, or I was tired, or spending time with husband was just enticing, or I wanted to finish that Netflix binge.
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Every reason sounded legitimate. The problem wasn't that I stopped. It was how long I stayed stopped.
Instead of recovering quickly, I rationalized. I'll start next week. I just need a little more time.
This season is unusually busy. Weeks became months. Months became years.
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What finally changed wasn't my schedule. It was my recovery speed. I stopped asking, why can't I stay consistent, and started asking, how quickly can I get back on track? And that question changed everything.
It's the difference between rationalizing and recovering. Every time we miss a commitment, we face a choice. Path number one is rationalizing.
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We explain, defend, delay, excuse. We tell ourselves a story that helps us feel better in the moment. Path number two is recovery.
We acknowledge what happened. We learn what we need to learn, and then we get back into motion. No drama, no shame spiral, no waiting for Monday, just the next right action.
The author and researcher Brene Brown once wrote, you either walk inside your own story and own it, or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness. Recovery is owning the story. Yep, I missed it.
Nope, that's not who I am. And what's my next step? That single question keeps a setback from becoming a pattern. What is my next step? And it's important also to know why this matters so much.
It matters because one missed day rarely ruins a goal. One missed week rarely ruins a goal. And in my case, waiting seven years and rationalizing before finally starting the book again is not going to deter me from the goal.
It's just later than I had intended. What hurts us is the growing gap between the miss and the restart. The longer the gap becomes, the easier it is to lose confidence.
The longer it becomes, the more likely we are to question ourselves, and the more difficult momentum feels. But high performers are not people who never fall behind. They're people who return faster.
In other words, one of the biggest ahas I've had, I learned from my own coaching. Recovery is a skill. When something goes sideways, try this simple sequence.
First, release the shame. Take a breath, roll your shoulders back and simply acknowledge reality. You might just say to yourself, that wasn't my best, but I choose better now.
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Second, identify one meaningful next step. You don't have to worry about the next five or 15 if doing that is going to delay you even further from taking that next step. Just identify one.
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Number three, set a timer. Now, as you've heard me say, in fact, in the last episode, especially, for me, I like to work in 50 minute blocks. But if you don't have 50 minutes, 25 minutes is enough.
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But give yourself a clear finish line. Fourth, celebrate the return. Not because you finished the work, but because you bothered to come back.
You reinforce the identity of someone who keeps showing up and that is worth celebrating. After seven years, when I recommitted to writing that book, spoke about it on my podcast and shared it with the world, I celebrated. When I picked my book back up after a seven-year hiatus, you darn right I celebrated.
Let's say you planned to spend 30 minutes writing during lunch, but instead you spent the entire break scrolling social media. Well, the rationalizing voice says, oh well, today's shot, I'll try again tomorrow. The recovery voice says, okay, that wasn't my plan, but I still have seven minutes.
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So, you stand up, get some water, take three deep breaths, open the document, set a timer, and write at least one sentence. You didn't recover perfectly, but you did recover quickly. And that makes all the difference.
One of the things I love about scripture is that God constantly works with people who needed to recover. Consider Peter, who denied Jesus, but Peter recovered. Consider Jonah, who ran in the opposite direction.
It may have been unwilling, but eventually Jonah recovered. The disciples repeatedly misunderstood what Jesus was teaching, but they recovered. God's story has never been about perfection.
It's always been about returning, whether it's returning to obedience or trust or purpose, or just returning to the work that God has put in your heart to accomplish. It might even be returning to the work your boss has put in your heart to finish. Whatever it is, you can do it.
Your challenge for this week is a pretty obvious one. Think about one area where you've been rationalizing instead of recovering. Maybe it's not even related to work at all.
Maybe it's your health. Maybe it's your relationships or your finances. Maybe it's coming to terms with your vision, your purpose, or calling.
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Maybe it's your relationship with God. Don't promise yourself a perfect week in order to make the necessary steps to begin or to recover, and don't wait until you have an elaborate plan. Simply schedule one recovery block in the next 24 hours.
That's your challenge. Don't forget to set a clear finish line and then get back in the game. One missed moment, even a seven-year one, does not define you.
What matters most is how quickly you return. And even after seven years, it's that you return. And maybe like me, since seven years have gone by, I'm thinking the quickly option has already passed.
However, now that I've started again, if I miss a day, what am I going to do? I'm going to quickly recover, and so can you. Next week in our Decision Fitness series, we're talking about how to lead your day before it leads you. Remember, you don't need a perfect restart.
You just need a next step. Thanks for listening, my friend. And if this has been helpful to you, please consider sharing it with a friend.
Don't forget to follow me and let me hear from you, whether on social media or email. Just let me know how you're doing. Until next time, may God bless you with goals and grace.
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